my father was diagnosed with
schizophrenia
and i
i found that out at a very young age
i found out as i was growing up and then
later on
i was always reminded of it uh that my
thought that i was born like two and a
half months early
because
my father decided that it would be a
good thing to try and get money from my
mother
and she was like seven and a half eight
months pregnant at the time
and he couldn't he couldn't uh
catch her
and he decided to throw
a lead pipe at my mother
and
she
because it hit her in the head she was
became unconscious
and there was a chance she was going to
die and lose us at the same time so uh
we were me and my twin brother were born
early
um
and this was all because of the mental
issues that he was going through
and honestly there was i mean just
that alone was pretty it was pretty big
did you find out about this incident
like at what age were you told that this
is what happened what did you always
know
um
no i i didn't i didn't i had no idea
until probably when i was a team as a
teenager
um
i don't think it was something that was
hidden
but um my mom was she was
she liked to keep like some of those
things to herself because you know um
maybe because of one reason like maybe
embarrassment
or just trying to protect us
would have been a big reason
uh
she would have kept something like that
from me and my
brothers so um that was uh definitely
a shock but
i mean my
experience with my father was never
never horrible never bad i didn't have
any of those experiences
um until later on
um
but that was when he was closer to where
he was gonna
pass from this world
it's just uh
his mental health issues became worse as
he got older
uh
he was like diagnosed
like 14 different types of
medications and
he didn't like to take them
and he sometimes refused to take them
and because of that he got he got
substantially worse
um
i know that like
10 10 years before he passed
he was stopped he was driving to uh
to a city where we used to live when
i was little
and you stop by the officer and the
officer comes up to him and asks him
what are you doing sir because he was
driving erratically
and he's and he tells the officer i'm
driving to
the city
to see my uh
well ex-wife and my kids
and
he was thinking i was like five
and i was already an adult by the time
this happened and
this is what happens when you don't when
he wasn't taking his medication
and
when he was diagnosed i i guess early on
he was also in the navy
but
as far as that i never heard any issues
but
the treatment way to treat mental health
issues has changed over time as well
um
and it's been it's very interesting
i i
didn't do a lot of research but
it wasn't anything that would have been
good
to treat mental health
um
yeah no so sorry to hear that
i mean that's really a hard thing right
for a child to see his father in that
state and to hear what happened to his
mother is also
must be really traumatic for you but the
good thing is that you forgive him and
you actually loved him too right you
understood that he could not help it
yeah i mean i've
i've always had trouble
coming to grips with that because i mean
my parents were
my world when i was obviously when i was
growing up and i it's just my world
revolved around them
yeah
and
i always
i can't say i've always tried but
i always liked tried to listen to my
mother
um
and uh
i think also because of the way that my
dad was
um i was more shut in i stayed away from
all other people i didn't really have a
lot of friends i didn't have a lot of
friends
so i think that
that was also
something that added to um
you know those mental health issues and
the anxiety that came a little bit with
it
yeah i mean i can imagine right like as
a child you see your father is different
from the friend's father
so it must be pretty difficult for you
to even like
face that fact right
i'll see how
actually
yeah
good you were also talking a little bit
that after you retired from the military
right uh how's life been after that
so um
it was difficult and
i
i mean i wouldn't say it's a daily event
but i mean the military is completely
a different way of life
uh i liked i liked talking to other
soldiers
our people just people
and uh
we had good rapport i was able to talk
to them they talked to me
and we had good conversations but since
i retired
that went away
yeah
and
i'd have to say i was i mean that that
brought a lot of anxiety um not to say
that i i mean i don't have a lot of
friends
and i mean that start all started with
i'd have to say the mental health issues
that my dad had i'm not i
shouldn't blame anyone but i mean it's
just the way that i was raised
and what i saw and who i am so keeping
busy really helped you uh
yes
discipline and keeping busy was
probably really good for your self right
and now you have all the time and you're
trying to figure out what's the next
phase of life
being at this age is really hard
yeah i i think it's in i think it's
difficult for anyone but
i mean trying to overcome something
that's
you know in
in your genetics
is uh
it's scary too right you don't know
some things that you got maybe out of
control
i i try not to think of that
my mom has has told me though if if ever
if there's ever a time
where you don't feel right please seek
help and i'm like
just thinking about that now is like
that's not good to hear
but are you not seeking help at all
um well
me and my wife we go to therapy
uh because i mean
i mean though they just
yeah
actually better i mean because of going
to therapy
i'm able to express myself better
and that's actually been a plus from
from going to therapy yeah
i mean
yeah no i understand where you're coming
from and i'm so glad that our cause is
being able to help you find some
meaningful work and
you're a great contributor and i
appreciate everything that you do for us
thank you
great thank you so much
[Music]
